Love and Courage over Tragedy! -Pramodini Roul.

 TRIGGER WARNING: Acid Attack, Graphic images

“I was 16 when the elections were around and paramilitary forces had been allotted near my college. There was a 28-year-old Odia man in the troop who started stalking me and eventually sent a proposal of marriage to my family. Our closest kinfolk, who had been a constant support after my father's death, turned down the proposal. The rejection was hard on him and thus, began the eve-teasing on a daily basis. 

Days after, he somehow got my house’s telephone number and called multiple times to convince my family and verbally abused them when they said NO. One evening while returning back home, he appeared out of nowhere and pestered me to get married to him at a temple. I narrated the event to my cousin, who then lost his cool and went to warn him! He challenged him that none of his tactics would ever work and BOOM! went the male-ego. 

Months later, we got a call from him again; he wanted to speak to me for the last time. He told me how he was aware of my dreams and that he wouldn’t bother me or my family anymore. His words were too good to be true! For a while, there was no sign of him. Life was back to normal. 

18th of April ’09 around 6:30PM, my cousin and me were on our way back home when a motorbike approached us and I could see him with a bottle in his hand, at the back seat. I was shook. Within half a minute, the bike stopped in front of us. He intimidated me to come with him. Arguments later, he said I’d regret the consequences if I did not give in.

When I ignored, he started to open the bottle and poured it over my head- I was screaming, I could feel my skin melt, my hair falling, my body burning. They both fled away. He looked back to say,” if you can’t be mine, then I won’t let you be anyone else’s!”.

I was taken to a hospital in Jagatsinghpur (without first aid). They referred me to Cuttack. It was supposed to be a one-hour journey, but the ambulance broke down mid-way and there were none available. We had started at 10:30pm and reached Cuttack by 4am. I was admitted in the ICU for nine months. My eyes were out; I went completely blind. I was in coma for 27 hours. My body was paralysed and I was brought home in utter hopelessness. I spent 2009 to 2014 in paralysis. My mother was the only one who kept me going. 

My family had given up, when a doctor suggested admission to Physiotherapy. In January 2014, I was taken to Life Care Nursing Home in Cuttack that has a Physiotherapy Centre under Dr R.N. Das. He examined my damaged nerves but couldn’t guarantee any improvement for years. A lady nurse at the place got her friends to show them my state. Among them was Saroj! 

Saroj spoke to Maa about the incident. He used to drop by casually. He had never seen me; I was always under covers. The first time he saw me without, he was taken aback. Something strangely connected him to us. His visits became more frequent. 3 months in, we couldn’t afford the medical costs anymore. The staff threatened us and our stuff was thrown out. 

Saroj came to our defense. I was shifted to a better place- he took responsibility and the doctor treated me for free. The nurse (former friend of Saroj) didn't like what had been up. Saroj, in the heat of moments, challenged her that he’ll make me walk in 4 months. Saroj resigned the same day and spent full-time working on me. The hard work doubled- 12 hours a day, 2 neurologists were hired and the process began! Hope bloomed when I hardly got back on my feet in 4 months. Saroj had believed in me throughout. Only Love can cure in such times, was his principle. 

Growing up, I was molested by a brother and a teacher and the acid attack was by an Army personnel; we’re always taught to respect soldiers, teachers, elders- but these incidents broke me. Saroj changed my view of men.

 

I went home in 2015 and Saroj came along during weekends. We practiced walking at nights so that I don’t face reactions of the villagers. Saroj’s family had been against him. I couldn’t help blaming myself for everything people I loved had to go through. I decided to leave Odisha.

I never considered myself eligible for anybody’s love, post the incident. Saroj’s family disturbances made me decide upon leaving Odisha. I wanted to fight for myself and take a stand but didn’t know how. I approached a cousin who surfed the internet to find ways how an acid-attack survivor can endure. We found a Delhi-based NGO ‘Chhanv Foundation’ and wrote to them. Alok Dixit contacted me in October 2015 and made arrangements for the shifting in 2 months. They were complete strangers to me but I just wanted to get away. 

Persuading Maa and breaking out the news to Saroj was difficult, but on reaching Delhi, I realised I am NOT ALONE. There came hope. I worked with their campaigns, became a  Board Member, spoke at events. I still had 20% vision in one eye, all this while. The team then decided that I go for the operation in 2017. Chances of gaining back my eyes weren’t great, but the operation was successful, though I could see only silhouettes, initially. 

I reopened my case in September 2017. It was difficult since the person was in Army and in a good position. I met the CM, Naveen Babu; he asked me what I really wanted. “Justice for myself and all the pending cases to reopen”, was my reply. Within the next few days, on 25th November, at 2 in the morning- he was arrested. 

I decided to start campaigning about Acid Attack Awareness in Odisha, in connection with ‘Chhanv Foundation’. My team has 11 survivors now- all brave and proud. We have "Sheroes Hangouts" in Agra and Lucknow- which is the first to employ acid attack survivors. 

Meanwhile, in January 2016, Saroj had proposed to me. We were separated by distance, but always connected at hearts. We got engaged in 2018 and together, we have been working out campaigns. We’ll fight our way through. I can’t wait to spend a lifetime with Saroj and I’m immensely grateful to have him in my life.” - Pramodini Roul.